The Gospel of Hate

Brothers, Sisters, we come together on a most unfortunate day. Today, we lay to rest a man among men, a true saint ( if you will excuse the expression). Brother Mike grew up here Podunk, Kentucky and as such we will inter at his family cemetery just up the holler from this here 1st United Only True Christians Church. Brother Mike was resolute in his faith during these troubled times, and we can all stand to learn something from his life. My personal favorite memory of Mike was this time we went across the river to Hogs Creeks. I know, I know but we was young and had to indulge in some recklessness of our own. So we was in town, talking some of the young lady folk and all of a sudden Mike gets a whiff of something. He pulls me away from the girls and points across the road to this little building. Guess what was In'er? A Catholic church. Let me tell ya, the spirit of the Lord shot into Mike and before I even had time to think, he was settin fire to that den of iniquity. I have never been more proud to next such a devout follower of the Lord in all my days.

But as you all know, Brother Mike wouldn't want this procession to be solely about him. No, he want us to take this opportunity to preach to any sinners in the congregation and scare them into submission. Turn with me to 7th Judges, verse 247. Here the Lord is said to have told somebody to say," Persecute all those different from you, be they Muslims, Jews, Catholics, and sometimes Methodists. If you do this you will gain the 10 by 15 room that composes Heaven, meant only for the members of the 1st United Only True Christian Church." . I would like all of you to keep that verse in mind on the 17th of this month we go to church the Depews up the holler opposite this other holler. They have had the misfortune of having a son marry a Jewish girl and then did nothing about it . May God have mercy on their souls.

As this day turns to rain, remember that Sister Kathy is selling her Nathan Bedford Forrest coasters and of course the churching of the Depews on the 17th. There will be pie in the kitchen afterwards. Now please join me in singing " Burn, Burn in Hell", page 207 in your Hymnal.