We really are unique

Hey, my name is Jacob "no hands" Simpson. I am an 11th grader at Henry Clay high school and am a member of the JROTC, young democrats, and go green club. I enjoy all of these little clubs because it gives me tons of people exactly like me to be around who I can complain with about how no one understands us. JROTC is super great, because I can really tell that i'm making a difference despite not really doing anything and that i'll grow up to be important even though war is bad.

My middle name is just something I got called one time so I thought to myself, "hey thats cool! I should let everyone see how cool my name is." Its also super unique. In fact, all the hundreds of people just like me who do this are also unique. While we are, have been, and will continue to talk about me because my problems are more important than everyone else's, I think the mainstream appearance is lame man. Me and thousands of other people like to show how unique we are by wearing black or neon colored skinny jeans, along with ragged tee-shirts from off name brands, and if we are feeling particularly rebellious, a hat.

One of my other favorite things to do is complain. Rich kids always pick on me, smart kids always pick on me, blacks, whites, hispanics, and asians pick on me too, every other demographic and social class in the whole school seems to dislike the 50% of the school me and my group make up, but despite being a very large group of people, we can't actually stick up for ourselves. And i'm sure they all dislike us because they hate people who are different from them and i'm sure it has nothing to do with how we act, those biggots.

My parents are smart, otherwise I wouldn't be in the academy. They are not that successful, but neither are we poor. Despite this, I really hate rich people and republicans, its so selfish that they don't give all of their hard earned money to people who have not earned it. I like to highlight how much this bothers me by acting entitled for help and pretending to help less fortunate people by joining B.S. clubs that don't do anything. The only real reason I am a liberal is because that seems to be the bandwagon thing right now, so if I want to be unique I should do it. I also dress and act like I live in a trailer, despite my parents probably being respectable people and thinking i'm a complete failure.

At the end of the day, me and all my clon...freinds who are exactly like me are the only "real" people in society and anyone who is not in our group is a conformer. They should be a better c- word, like communist.