How to be sketchy

The first thing to remember is that appearances are everything. If someone's first impression of you is that you are likely to kidnap their children or themselves then you have succeeded.
For starters, NEVER be clean shaven. Have a large beard that is totally unkempt. Also, being bald is helpful. The next most important thing is clothing. This part is really easy because you can wear whatever you want since you should be wearing a trenchcoat everyday anyways. These are fantastic because it let's you keep your hands and your person concealed. No one knows what you have hidden underneath it, you could have meth, a gun, a human child, or all three. As far as your car, you need some sort of large van, preferably without windows. Something that looks like it could hold an entire kindergarten class and no one would know. If you are really 'bout it then you should drive an old, beaten up ice cream truck.
The next thing to remember is how to act when interacting with people. When asked a question, never give a straightforward answer. Questions like "where have you been?" or "are you doing anything later?" should be answered with "don't worry about it" or "about" and "perhaps". You should keep your shoulders slumped and make sure your eyes dart a lot.
If you do all of these things then you are sure to be the sketchiest person around, and your friends will admire you for it.